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Outfit-Advice: Barack Obama X Hurrikan “Sandy”

 

Floods have always been the election campaign booster. Gerhard Schröder knows that quite well, since the flooding of the Elbe in 2002 secured his re-election as chancellor. Before the flood that was not at all a given.

The same goes for Obama being re-elected as president of the USA. His competitor Mitt Romney is surprisingly strong and manages to win over votes beyond the Republican realm.

Hurricane ‘Sandy’, that was plowing through New York last night is providing Barack Obama with an excellent opportunity to prove himself as a hands-on crisis manager and man of the people.

We’re attempting a recommendation for an outfit that suits the occasion, copied one-to-one from Gerhard ‘Acker’ Schröder:

1)   Since Obama still is a statesman who will obviously not change solely for his helper mission he should wear a white shirt, the key piece of any western politician’s uniform. He should drop the tie since a hurricane requires straight-on tackling of the issues. A tie would just be redundant here.

2)   The black suit pants, also a standard in the politicians’ wardrobe, is tucked into the rubber boots. The color of the boots is especially important: Yellow would be too obvious and too staged, so it has to be black. To make clear nonetheless that it’s rubber boots, however, that he is wearing, Obama should perhaps just wade through a mud puddle without hesitation.

3)   Moving on to the most essential part of the helper’s wardrobe, the raincoat. This piece of clothing can singlehandedly decide the re-election. A subtle, yet obvious outdoor color is important. Mud green (olive) is perfect! Whoever put that jacket on Schröder back then at the Elbe is a genius. It is also crucial that the raincoat is slightly too big. That’s supposed to send the signal: It’s not about the perfect fit or great looks. In such existential moments like these the chancellor is not concerned with his appearance as he is (obviously) saving those affected from further hardship here.

We don’t know about the relationship between Schröder and Obama or whether they have even met in person. Should that be the case though, we advise Schorsch Schröder to send a Care package with his original outfit to Obama as quickly as possible.

Should they not know each other, or Schröder can’t be bothered to go to the post office we’ll just assume that Obama’s consultants regularly read DANDY DIARY and recommend them to use our ‘Outfit guide to repeatedly win the elections in the case of a flood’ as guidance. Yes, you can!

Von: Jakob

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Massive Autumn-Shoes, despite poor Fellow-Runners: RED WING

Alright, it is enough by now: this autumn, the crawling cold and also the wet feet.

From now on I am wearing boots. Call me whatever you want. If you insist also a Prenzlauer Berg-hiker.

Starting today, I am putting my feet in the warm-feet-classic RED WING, so that I will stop freezing. One would know this shoes mainly by seeing them on advertisement-agency owners from Hamburg wearing them during weekend-autumn-walks with their big dogs while resting on Sylt or on edgy Düsseldorf- inhabitants, who also enjoy wearing ‘Designer-Jeans‘ and half-long hair. I am neither of those two things, and I do not want to become either.

But them and me, we are connected now: by having warm, dry feet. And that is worth it! For real. It is enough.

Von: Julian

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