Berlin Fashion Week: The three “No-go-shows”

While there are three shows we’re absolutely looking forward to at this year’s Mercedes Benz Berlin Fashion Week there is also – as is the custom in Berlin – quite an amount of trash to see.

Therefore, here an official warning. We recommend instead of seeing these shows to just stay home, sleep, or have a wank first and then sleep. It doesn’t matter what it is. Anything is better than seeing these shows.



Guido M. K. is not only Germany’s most popular shopping queen but also the industry’s most popular hooker: He does it with everyone, even for a few bucks.

Word on the street is that Kretschmer is the most promiscuous corporate fashion designer of them all in Germany. Selection criteria for collaborations don’t seem to exist: He’s already done it with HÖGL, SPAR MARKT, EBAY, and TUI. Ok then.

His own fashion that he distributes under the very humble name GUIDO MARIA KRETSCHMER is suitably placed in between the brutal trash glitter aesthetic of a Harald Glöckler, and the fast fashion crap chain PRIMARK.

It’s only obvious that everyone’s darling Kretschmer is the favorite of Germany’s C-list celebrities who doesn’t spare anyone on the red carpet a kiss. Very telling as well, because it’s clear that GMK is about everything else – but fashion.

We recommend the designer: Shop more, more kisses – (much) less designing yourself.



The fact that a label such as MINX BY EVA LUTZ can present its so called fashion at Berlin Fashion Week sums up the dilemma of the domestic event:

Von: Carl Jakob Haupt

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